Death Wish
by Ultiman92
Summary: When will it end?


Hello. This is a new venture for me, a grand departure from what I usually write, so please forgive me if it's not that good.

My main inspiration for this story came from another writer on this site. He is one of the most underrated authors I have seen on this site, with talent well worth appreciating. His name is cornwallace.

Cornwallace is a true five star author, producing a gem almost every time he releases a story. He has a flair for angst and horror, making him a creepy yet brilliant writer.

Unfortunately, looking at his profile and author's notes shows that cornwallace seems to be very depressed, prone to self-deprication. Hopefully, if he ever happens to read this, it'll cheer him up a little. After all, who wouldn't enjoy a story written in their name?

I've written this story in a style somewhere between my own and cornwallace's, to give the uninitiated a taste of his talent. If you like this fic and have a taste for the dark, go and try cornwallace's stories. They're bound to be good reads.

I hereby dedicate this story to cornwallace, the Stephen King of Sonic the Hedgehog.

* * *

Let me tell you something.

Immortality isn't all it's cracked up to be.

I'm living proof. I've lived for a thousand lifetimes and existence isn't getting any easier.

I want an end.

Life sickens me now. I've seen too much, felt too much, lost too much. Continued living only causes me pain.

Damn you, Gerald.

You did this to me, gave me a curse disguised as a blessing. You made me the ultimate life form, designed to live forever.

Didn't you know what this would do to me?

I've lost countless people I held dear, forced to watch them wither and die while I neverchange. Their faces are blurry now. I no longer want to remember.

Ten years turned into a hundred, a hundred into a thousand, and I still endured. Invasion, disaster, plague besieged Mobius, but I had become weary of playing hero.

I fled to the ARK, deciding to spend eternity in isolated exile. No more pleas for help. No more relationships. No more suffering.

It didn't help.

Can you possibly imagine what it was like for me? All alone, floating in space?

Of course you can't. You'd go mad trying.

That was what inevitably happened to me.

I went insane and regained my sanity countless times over, constantly driven to dementia by the creeping isolation.

Several times I imagined monsters stalking me. I couldn't see them, they were always just out of the corner of my eye, but they were there, oh yes they were there, reaching out toward me with their long, slender fingers _and I couldn't escape them no matter how far I ran they were everywhere everywhere all over the ARK oh God oh God I can't escape them I can't run any farther just let them grab me, let them reach their fingers down my throat and pull out my organs just do it do it do it DO IT ALREADY oh God God God just MAKE IT STOP-_

I always found myself huddling in some corridor, shivering uncontrollably and lying in a puddle of my own bodily fluids. I'd get to my feet, clean myself, and go on with my business, dreading the moment my sanity lapsed again.

That used to be the worst of it.

Then the mutations started.

I'd been neglecting to take care of the ARK for several months. There wasn't any point, now that I no longer cared whether I lived or died.

One morning I awoke to find myself floating in midair. Assuming the gravity had shut down, I awkwardly swam to the control room. A flashing panel informed me that a window in Deck C had blown out. Overnight, all the air had been sucked out of the ship. The ARK was a vacuum.

I stared at the panel in puzzlement, wondering why the hell I wasn't dead.

After several hours of thought, I determined that my physiology had evolved over the millennia I had been alive. An unpredictable bundle of genes had mutated, allowing my body to adapt and survive in almost any environment.

My body seemed to be actively conspiring against me, denying me the rest I so desperately wanted. Only the destruction of the universe seemed capable of killing me now.

With no other options left to me, I tried one last, desperate attempt to end my miserable existence.

If the ARK couldn't kill me, maybe Mobius could.

I floated out of the ARK, gazing down at the blue planet before me.

Spreading my arms, I began to fall into Mobius' atmosphere.

I kept my eyes open the whole time. I wasn't going to face death as a coward.

It felt like I was entering Hell itself. The massive, rolling waves of heat inside the atmosphere were agony to me. My vision began to blur, the planet beneath me swimming in a fog of tears.

It grew still hotter. The smell of burning flesh reached my nose, alerting me that I had caught on fire. I grimaced, my melting teeth twisting my face into a macabre grin. Patches of my fur burned and fell off, spiraling away into the air.

Surely death was upon me now.

With a pop, a blood vessel in my eye burst, spreading a dark stain across my left eye.

I could stay awake no longer. I fell unconscious, praying to every deity I knew that I would not survive.

* * *

Voices. Fading. In and out. Pain. Far away. Doesn't matter. Sleep.

…_my shepherd…shall not want…_

* * *

Being dragged. Stop. Don't want. Lie here forever.

…_lie down…green pastures…beside the still waters…_

* * *

Wetness on face. Don't want. Loud voices. Sound scared. Don't care. Won't wake up. Tired.

…_restore my soul…lead me in path of righteousness… _

* * *

Dragged again. Stop. Shade. Good. Comfortable. Sleep now.

…_though I walk…shadow of death…I am not afraid…_

* * *

My eyes slowly drifted open.

I was looking at the inside of a tent. Beige, with crude stitching tying the fabric together. Probably handmade.

I stared at it for awhile, trying to figure out how I had gotten here. There was something wrong with this situation, but I couldn't remember what.

Suddenly, I could.

I was alive.

_I was alive._

This couldn't be possible! I felt myself burn, goddammit! _I burned!_ I can't still be-

I looked down at my body, dreading what I would find.

Bright, unaltered black fur, perfectly straight and shiny with not a single hair out of place.

I leapt to my feet, screaming in anger and frustration. I smashed the cot I had been lying on, blind with rage.

I began tearing apart the other items in the tent. Desks, drawers, and cabinets were upended and trashed.

In the middle of my rampage, a strange light green creature rushed into the tent, shouting frantically in broken speech.

"Do not be angry, mighty one!" he babbled. "We are sorry to have done you wrong! Please forgive!"

I stopped screaming, getting a good look at this newcomer.

He had vaguely Mobian proportions, with a body and head structure vaguely hedgehog-like. Instead of quills, several long, sharp spines protruded from the back of his head, going past his neck. His eyes were completely black with small white pupils. Two slits occupied the space where his nose would be, opening and closing with his breathing. His arms ended in claws, which were tapping together in agitation. He wore a dull gray robe with no signs or markings.

"Who are you? What is this place?" I demanded.

"I am Mixom, mighty one," he stammered. "You are being in the holy lands of Yujunaki. I am most apologizing for your treatment. We was not sure how to treat a god."

"Did you heal me?" I snapped, baring my fangs. "_Did you? __**Answer me!**_"

Mixom shrank away from me. "It was no our doing! Your miraculous body, wonder upon wonders, restore itself! We find you after fall from sky. Elders say, no take him. This god long dead. I say, take him. Gods demand honor. I be god's interpreter. I speak their tongue. I help him myself. So you taken to holy land. Before every sleep, we check you. You heal slow, but well. By today, your body prime!"

I scowled. I been so close, _so close,_ had leaned over the very precipice of Death, and this damned cursed body had pulled me back again.

"Would you be liking refreshments, mighty one?" Mixom asked timidly.

I scrutinized the quivering monk before me. Annoying creature, but he seemed to worship me. This could come in handy.

"Where's the nearest city?" I barked. "I wish to go there."

Mixom took my hand and dragged me outside the tent.

Bright sun assaulted my vision. I covered my eyes, scanning the surrounding area.

I was standing in the middle of a desert camp, surrounded by tents identical to the one I had just exited. Robed creatures identical to Mixom were everywhere, doing everything from cooking food over a fire to leading prayer chants. All fell silent when I appeared.

Mixom dragged me to the outskirts of the camp, pointing off into the distance. On the horizon, a silver city twinkled in the waves of heat.

"That is _Parighiim Pardarens_, or 'Paradigm Plaza' in the gods' tongue," Mixom pronounced carefully. "It is two sleeps from here."

"Take me there," I said immediately.

Mixom bowed low. "As you are wishing."

* * *

It took awhile to convince the leaders of the camp to leave. Mixom told me they had reservations on obeying someone like me.

Idiotic, brainless pacifists. If I didn't need them to lead me through the desert, I would've slaughtered every last one of them.

The monks quickly packed up their tents, breaking camp and beginning the trek to Paradigm Plaza. They moved at a surprising pace, covering about twenty miles a day.

I was always at the front, eyes fixed on my destination.

* * *

By the end of the third day, we reached the city limits.

Wiping the sweat off my brow, I stared up at Paradigm Plaza. Over a thousand years' worth of technological breakthroughs had come to fruition here. If nothing else, technology was always giving us better ways to kill each other. There had to be _something _there powerful enough to destroy my invincible form.

A light blue creature similar to Mixom appeared at the city gate, shaking his head and glaring at the monks. He spoke slowly and reproachfully in the monks' language – then his eyes fell on me.

He stumbled backwards, looking shocked. He began babbling frantically, unable to meet my eyes.

Mixom appeared at my side. "He is saying his apologies. He recognizing you from ancient pictures. He was not realizing we had brought an immortal here. He is wishing you do no harm."

"Tell him I am not an angry god, unless provoked," I replied impassively. "All I want is to view the city. I have lived in isolation for centuries, and I wish to see how the world has changed since I left."

Mixom promptly translated for me.

The creature visibly relaxed, opening the gate and gesturing for me to follow.

Mixom and I walked through, leaving the other monks to set up camp on the outskirts.

* * *

The creature led us through the streets, pointing out prominent buildings and landmarks.

Mixom kept up a steady stream of translation. "-there is the Solaris Fountain, gift from the Soleanna. Dresden Spire ahead, made of spinning liquid metal. Most wondrous. Temple to right, dedicating to gods like yourself-"

I sighed. Tourist trash, all of it.

Was there _nothing_ here that could kill me?

"-grav-sled park, most disgusting materialistic pleasure. The Sol Plant, full safe nuclear reactor. Very clean and sufficient. Art museum to right-"

I stopped dead in my tracks, Mixom's words reverberating through my head.

_Nuclear reactor. Nuclear reactor. Nuclear reactor._

A nuclear blast. Of course. My body couldn't regenerate in an environment that was pure destruction.

The perfect death. No way to survive.

Mixom and the creature were staring at me curiously, wondering why I'd stopped.

"Mighty one? Is something matter?" Mixom asked.

I shook myself out of my trance. "No, nothing is wrong," I said carefully. "The clean nuclear reactor. I am…amazed by such a thing. I would like to visit it."

Mixom translated to the creature, who nodded. We abruptly changed direction, heading straight for the pristine white cooling towers.

* * *

I strode briskly through the halls of the facility, my shoes clacking off the title. Behind me, Mixom and the creature hurried to keep up.

I came to a halt at a corner, impatiently scanning the hallway. The reactor core was nowhere in sight.

Mixom jogged up next to me, panting heavily. "Could…you be… slowing down…please? We are...not fast…like yourself."

"Oh, I'm very sorry," I said, layering my voice with compassion. "I'm just in a hurry to learn about this place."

Mixom nodded. "I am understanding…your curiosity. I would be advising…patience, mighty one."

"Good idea," I said, pretending to think for a minute. "Could you go find a guide for me, please? I'm sure one of them could give me some information."

Mixom nodded enthusiastically. "As you are wishing, mighty one!"

He turned and ran down the hall, dragging the confused creature with him.

"Good riddance, you pathetic little sycophant," I muttered to myself, turning and sprinting off in the opposite direction.

* * *

Barging through locked door after locked door, I advanced deeper into the facility.

Soon, my way was blocked by a large silver door. _DANGER: RADIOACTIVE MATERIAL. AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY_ was printed on it in large red letters.

I tried the handle. Predictably, it didn't move at all. Vacuum sealed, probably.

I stepped back, crackling my knuckles. Concentrating hard, I drew upon the Chaos energy inside me. My efforts were rewarded when my gloves began to spark.

In a swift, brutal motion, I struck the door with a concentrated blast of Chaos power.

There was a pause, then the door fell inward with a loud crash. Satisfied, I strolled inside.

Two humanoid scientists were adjusting several consoles inside the control room. They stared at me as I entered, shock and surprise written on their faces.

Beyond them, I could see the metal cylinder that contained the reactor core, humming softly.

One of the scientists quickly regained his composure. He pulled out a walkie-talkie, angrily yelling into it.

In a flash, I was inside the control room and at his side. With one quick yank, I snapped his neck.

His body crumpled to the floor, the walkie-talkie falling out of his hand. The other scientist looked horrified, frantically scrambling to escape the control room.

I held out a hand. "Chaos Spear."

Several jagged bolts of energy streaked out from my hand, impaling themselves in the fleeing scientist's chest. He fell over on his side, jerking and twitching as the life drained out of him. The scientist gave on last gurgle, then lay still.

Turning my back on the corpses, I began to input a new set of directions into the consoles. Every dial was twisted to maximum, ensuring a fast detonation. The core shuddered, then began humming even louder.

Outside, I could hear alarms, warning everyone to leave the building.

I took hold of the door to the core room, a grim smile on my face.

"Mighty one! What are you doing?!"

Growling in frustration, I turned to see Mixom standing outside the control room looking horrorstricken. "You kill these men! You cause explosion! Why, mighty one? What has we done to enrage you so?"

"You don't get it, do you?" I sneered. "I'm no god. Just a bitter old immortal who wants to go out with a bang."

"You cannot be continue to do this!" Mixom cried out, tears running down his face. "You cannot!"

"S_hut up _already, you sniveling little mongrel," I said contemptuously, raising my hand. "Chaos Spear."

A flash of light.

Mixom shuddered, looking down at the large golden bolt sticking out of his chest. His eyes rolled up in his head, his lifeless body falling to the floor.

I turned back to the core room, yanking the door open and stepping inside. The core was at full output now, humming loud enough to be deafening.

Mustering up all the energy I had left, I placed my hands upon the core – and unleashed a Chaos Blast.

* * *

…whiteness… so much whiteness…throwing me back…the heat…

…_twinkle, twinkle…little star…_

* * *

…the white…filling my vision…so beautiful…

…_up above the world so high…like a diamond in the sky…_

* * *

…i can see…so much…the sight of god…

…_when the blazing sun is gone…when he nothing shines upon…_

* * *

…i can see…the heart of stars…the universe…

…_then you show your little light…twinkle, twinkle all the night…_

* * *

…is this death?...oh… it feels so…wonderful…

…_then the traveler in the dark…thanks you for your little spark…_

* * *

…i can't believe…finally…peace…

…_he could not see which way to go…if you did not twinkle so…_

* * *

…it feels so good…better than i'd imagined…

…_in the dark blue sky you keep…and often through my curtains peep…_

* * *

…at last…now…i can sleep…

…_for you never shut your eye…till the sun is in the sky…_

* * *

…take me…i'm ready…

…_as your bright and shiny spark…lights the traveler in the dark…_

* * *

…today…the ultimate life form…dies…

…_though I know not what you are…twinkle, twinkle…little star… _


End file.
